Football Season is Icky

I hate football season. Football season means Autumn, and Autumn means Winter and Winter is stupid.

Oh, but Stacy, you say you can always find the silver lining. Where's the silver lining in this? I say, "Shut Up."

Autumn feels like a Sunday night when your homework isn't done and you have a big test on Monday. It gets dark earlier, you have to wear a jacket or a sweater, you have to turn the heat on. I like the air conditioning. I like sandals and t-shirts. I like sitting on the porch and not freezing my butt off.

"But, you can eat soup, and chili, and cuddle on the couch! You can take long walks and crunch through the leaves! It's romantic!" I hear you exclaim. I eat soup and chili when I want to, and if you turn the air up enough, you can cuddle in any weather. I don't like brown, dead leaves, and it's not romantic. It's icky.

"So move," I hear you say. I say, "No. I hate moving more than I hate Winter." And, yes, I have an answer for everything.

Why am I on this subject, seeing as it's still early days in August? It's pre-season football time. It's the sign that Summer is on the way out and Autumn is on the way in. And so these early pre-season games depress me and put me in a not-so-sunny mood. I feel my little black rain cloud gathering.